Love.... actually???

i thought for sure my dream had come true. growing up i didn't dream of being a rockstar.. dream of being a basketball player. i dreamed of being in love. silly right.. it took me 20 years to find it. and boy did it hit me hard. if i had to focus on all the negative aspects of it. i sacrificed everything. my family, my friends, my reputation.. just to see that smile on your face. thats all that mattered to me.. its all i cared about... LOVE. and now... where has it gotten me. everyone hates me.. even you. so what do i do now. what do you do when you have nothing left. no dreams no goals. just and empty void that fills me up with depression and sadness. if i can take any solice from this pain it is that i truly was in love to feel this pain. to feel this gut wrenching heart twisting pain makes me feel... something. love... actually hurts.